I hate that word. The word "infertility" makes me cringe, for all those that suffer from it... including myself. I'm sure there is lots of speculation from family and friends, and I'm sure a lot of you already knew. We've been married 5 and 1/2 years and are almost 31... and are active LDS. And sure I have a career that I enjoy but that is not holding us back from having children. For a long time I wanted people to think that was the case. I didn't want people to know the heartbreak we were going through behind closed doors. But Scott and I both feel strong that after three years, we are ready to be honest with those around us and not hide behind this. We think it will be a strength to us.
I am not going to give lots of details because that is just not our style. But I will give you a brief summary of what we've been through. We decided it was time to start a family almost 3 years ago. About 4 months later I found out I was pregnant but I didn't feel quite right physically. I think I knew I was going to miscarry, and about a week later I did. Although I thought I was probably going to miscarry, it was still horrible and heartbreaking when it happened. We continued on with our lives and nothing happened. Needless to say, we've been to a series of doctors, I've had a few surgeries, been on different meds, and are now waiting on another physical issue to hopefully resolve itself so that another surgery isn't required. It's a frustrating lonely journey and moving to Phoenix I've felt like we've had redo a lot of what we did in Utah before we moved.
In the future, I won't be giving you every detail of this journey. That to us is personal, but we'll be open to telling the basic details to our family and close friends. So if you are one of them, don't be afraid to ask. We'll share as much as we are comfortable with.
If you want to know how to help, please pray for us, that's all we can ask right now.
This is not an easy journey and I'm sure there are some journeys that are harder. But this is ours, and we are trying to endure it well. We know we will have kids in this life one way or another, we've been promised that. But for now we're just parents waiting for a child.
5 comments:
You two are amazing. We will pray for you.
You should talk to Jana. She is having a similar struggle. We love you and having watched Jana go through this for 11 years it breaks my heart to hear someone else is going through this.
I can imagine how difficult it was to write this post and put yourself out there and I admire you for being so brave. I'm so sorry that you and Scott have been going through this--I know it can feel so isolating and lonely at times. Thoughts and prayers to you and Scott. And hugs.
Hugs! We are always thinking of you guys! You will be in our prayers.
Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you and praying for you. I knew we have never met, but I know how difficult this journey can be and how isolated you can feel at times. Just trust in the Lord and in his timing and he will provide :)
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